What’s it like to lose a child?

Attention: This post is going to be sadder than usual.

A couple of days ago, the sister of a dear friend of mine passed away in a car accident, at the age of 25. Those very sad news got me thinking about life and death but mostly about her parents, and the burden of having to lose a child.

I started thinking about what her family is going through, but mostly what her parents are going through.

Having kids of my own now, I know that what a parent wants, beyond everything, is the well-being and happiness of their child.

I know that when one of my kids gets sick, I feel so bad and it won’t go away until they feel better. I know that when I knew that my little Diane had to go through different medical procedures for her feet, I cried. I can’t see them suffer. I suffer when I see them suffer. And I’m not even exaggerating.

It’s hard to say it, but I can’t even begin to imagine what’s it like to have to say goodbye to your child. To say goodbye to those hopes and dreams that you had for them, to their future you were looking for, to have to say goodbye to the fruit of your own womb.

I know that my life would not make sense anymore. And I’m crazy scared of that thought.

A few years ago, a very dear family had to say goodbye to their 8 year-old. I was heartbroken, I tried being there for his sister, but I can honestly say now that I didn’t really know what it means for the parents. I obviously knew it was hard. I obviously knew that they suffered. But I didn’t really grasp their whole suffering. Until my twins were born.

My heart aches while writing this, while thinking of those parents who lost their children.

To you, Martine and Mikey, to you, the Dahers and the Zgheibs. May God be with you and give you the strength to carry that cross of yours. My thoughts and prayers are with you, always.

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